BESTEST FRIENDS IN THE WORLDED
My first memory was the day you performed
the magic show in Miss Sullivan’s class
You invited me to your Cabbage Patch party;
I brought my Cyndi Lauper record
By the fifth grade we were close enough to share the same coat
and dress up as the two-headed roller skater
Slipped on Isotoners to cat-foot it onto Garfield’s street
and “spy” on passing cars
took them off to face-paint the soles of our feet
We danced to the tune of bum-bum, kitty-kitty
where the rapists and Jersey barriers play
Crossed-dressed and ran from Mugsy and men in Broncos
Snorted Smarties and trafficked gumballs
Wished on the same shooting star
Waited 40 years to jump off the ironing board
and for you to clean the bunny cage
Hitched the ride to Nana’s
laughing to stop having fun back there!
Put our heads together to make
my brown eyes, yours, blue
Your one kidney, my two
Always one more than you
I’d give you both
Infinity
2003
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Do not be afraid
from the blog OneRoofAfrica.com: "Old habits--like clutching your food so no one else at the orphanage takes it from you--die hard."
Reading again about Sterling's understandable fear reminded me of something a woman I highly admire used to say to her often fearful and anxious son: "Joshua, don't be afraid." Not long-winded, but straight to the point and a good reminder. How often does God have to whisper that to us?
Often.
"Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid..."
-from the song, "A New Law", by Derek Webb
Hanging on God alone
"They were to be alone with God, for they were not dealing with the laws of nature, nor human government, nor the church, nor the priesthood, nor even with the great prophet of God, but they must needs be isolated from all creatures, from all leaning circumstances, from all props of human reason, and swung off, as it were, into the vast blue inter-stellar space, hanging on God alone, in touch with the fountain of miracles.
Here is a part in the programme of God's dealings, a secret chamber of isolation in prayer and faith which every soul must enter that is very fruitful.
There are times and places where God will form a mysterious wall around us, and cut away all props, and all the ordinary ways of doing things, and shut us up to something Divine, which is utterly new and unexpected, something that old circumstances do not fit into, where we do not know just what will happen, where God is cutting the cloth of our lives on a new pattern, where He makes us look to Himself.
Most religious people live in a sort of treadmill life, where they can calculate almost everything that will happen, but the souls that God leads out into immediate and special dealings, He shuts in where all they know is that God has hold of them, and is dealing with them, and their expectation is from Him alone.
Like [the] widow, we must be detached from outward things and attached inwardly to the Lord alone in order to see His wonders.--Soul Food
Here is a part in the programme of God's dealings, a secret chamber of isolation in prayer and faith which every soul must enter that is very fruitful.
There are times and places where God will form a mysterious wall around us, and cut away all props, and all the ordinary ways of doing things, and shut us up to something Divine, which is utterly new and unexpected, something that old circumstances do not fit into, where we do not know just what will happen, where God is cutting the cloth of our lives on a new pattern, where He makes us look to Himself.
Most religious people live in a sort of treadmill life, where they can calculate almost everything that will happen, but the souls that God leads out into immediate and special dealings, He shuts in where all they know is that God has hold of them, and is dealing with them, and their expectation is from Him alone.
Like [the] widow, we must be detached from outward things and attached inwardly to the Lord alone in order to see His wonders.--Soul Food
Friday, May 22, 2009
Waiting for Sunday...
SOUTHBOROUGH L’ABRI NEWSLETTER, SPRING/SUMMER, 2009
49 Lynbrook Road, Southborough, MA 01772
....There are two ways to experience a story. The first way is when you know the ending and are re-reading or re-hearing it. The second is when you don’t know the end or any of the events until they happen. The first can have greater depth and the second has the intensity of suspense in uncertainty.
Many of us know how Bible stories are going to turn out. This is a good thing, but also a liability. If we know a story well it is easy to have a sense that the end was natural, obvious or inevitable. Anybody could have seen it coming. Easter follows Good Friday. It always has. There are no surprises there. We cannot pretend to “not know” about Easter Sunday, but we can try to put ourselves in the shoes of the people who thought that Good Friday was the end of the story of Jesus. If we don’t do that, we miss out on a lot that we need to learn. The problem at hand is that we all live our own lives in the second way, learning of events only as they happen and not knowing how our story will end. We are all future-blind and we need to learn how to live that way, but by faith. The early followers of Jesus could not “fast forward” to Easter Sunday, just as we can’t “fast forward” over times of darkness, grief and disappointment in our own lives.
I think it is hard for us to realize the kind of catastrophe Good Friday was to the disciples. So many hopes smashed, so much grief, helpless outrage and bewilderment. How could they have gotten it so wrong? Where was God? It was too hard to imagine that God the Father had failed or that Jesus had failed either. But what had gone wrong?
There is new interest in Saturday, “Holy Saturday”, but it is not because the Bible tells us much about what took place that day. It was the Sabbath, so the main thing they had to do was to be still. But imagine what it meant for them to be still after what had just happened the day before – their Savior, their Lord, their Hope, their Friend and their God, the one they had given up everything to follow, had just been tortured to death. They couldn’t do any of the normal things to distract themselves because it was the Sabbath. They were stuck having to stay still, think about it, and worship God. But where had God been yesterday?
Somehow, they had no hope for his resurrection. When the news first came to them from the women who had been to the tomb on Sunday morning, they considered it “nonsense”, “an idle tale”. Why? My guess is that whenever Jesus had predicted his crucifixion, the disciples had been so adamant to dissuade him from even thinking about his death, that they never heard him when he went on to speak of his resurrection. Whatever the reason, they lived Friday, all day Saturday and the start of Sunday morning with grief, confusion and without hope.
One implication of all this is that God in his wisdom seems to have allowed his people to go through this time of darkness and even despair, to look into a chasm of hopelessness. It seems also that he allows this to happen to us also, as we live out our life’s story without knowing future events or having a fast forward button available. Most of us have gone through times of bewilderment and despair. Many who come here as students certainly have, but have been taught that despair should not happen to “good Christians” and so do not think they even have the right to talk about it. Thank God that people in the Biblical account did not feel so constrained! God seems to allow these times for reasons that are in any final sense, unknown to us. But perhaps a partial reason might be that we can learn things that we cannot learn when everything is working according to our plans. His presence is with us even when we feel that we are experiencing his absence.
Easter Sunday was a time of lights switching on all over the place, lights of understanding and hope. Suddenly Jesus as king could be taken seriously again. The idea of Jesus as High Priest could be taken seriously for the first time – that his death was his own intentional, once for all sacrifice for the sins of all those who would ever trust in him. So much of his teaching began to make sense to them, sense that it never had made before. They could suddenly see how he was the “good shepherd who laid down his life for the sheep”, the “lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world”.
So, as we hear the story of Jesus, knowing its ending, let’s still try to experience it from the shoes of those who couldn’t see Easter coming. If we dare to look into the dark of their hopelessness, we may learn more about the brightness of the lights that came on at the resurrection, and that are still shining. That way we may also learn something about navigating our own future-blind lives by faith.
49 Lynbrook Road, Southborough, MA 01772
....There are two ways to experience a story. The first way is when you know the ending and are re-reading or re-hearing it. The second is when you don’t know the end or any of the events until they happen. The first can have greater depth and the second has the intensity of suspense in uncertainty.
Many of us know how Bible stories are going to turn out. This is a good thing, but also a liability. If we know a story well it is easy to have a sense that the end was natural, obvious or inevitable. Anybody could have seen it coming. Easter follows Good Friday. It always has. There are no surprises there. We cannot pretend to “not know” about Easter Sunday, but we can try to put ourselves in the shoes of the people who thought that Good Friday was the end of the story of Jesus. If we don’t do that, we miss out on a lot that we need to learn. The problem at hand is that we all live our own lives in the second way, learning of events only as they happen and not knowing how our story will end. We are all future-blind and we need to learn how to live that way, but by faith. The early followers of Jesus could not “fast forward” to Easter Sunday, just as we can’t “fast forward” over times of darkness, grief and disappointment in our own lives.
I think it is hard for us to realize the kind of catastrophe Good Friday was to the disciples. So many hopes smashed, so much grief, helpless outrage and bewilderment. How could they have gotten it so wrong? Where was God? It was too hard to imagine that God the Father had failed or that Jesus had failed either. But what had gone wrong?
There is new interest in Saturday, “Holy Saturday”, but it is not because the Bible tells us much about what took place that day. It was the Sabbath, so the main thing they had to do was to be still. But imagine what it meant for them to be still after what had just happened the day before – their Savior, their Lord, their Hope, their Friend and their God, the one they had given up everything to follow, had just been tortured to death. They couldn’t do any of the normal things to distract themselves because it was the Sabbath. They were stuck having to stay still, think about it, and worship God. But where had God been yesterday?
Somehow, they had no hope for his resurrection. When the news first came to them from the women who had been to the tomb on Sunday morning, they considered it “nonsense”, “an idle tale”. Why? My guess is that whenever Jesus had predicted his crucifixion, the disciples had been so adamant to dissuade him from even thinking about his death, that they never heard him when he went on to speak of his resurrection. Whatever the reason, they lived Friday, all day Saturday and the start of Sunday morning with grief, confusion and without hope.
One implication of all this is that God in his wisdom seems to have allowed his people to go through this time of darkness and even despair, to look into a chasm of hopelessness. It seems also that he allows this to happen to us also, as we live out our life’s story without knowing future events or having a fast forward button available. Most of us have gone through times of bewilderment and despair. Many who come here as students certainly have, but have been taught that despair should not happen to “good Christians” and so do not think they even have the right to talk about it. Thank God that people in the Biblical account did not feel so constrained! God seems to allow these times for reasons that are in any final sense, unknown to us. But perhaps a partial reason might be that we can learn things that we cannot learn when everything is working according to our plans. His presence is with us even when we feel that we are experiencing his absence.
Easter Sunday was a time of lights switching on all over the place, lights of understanding and hope. Suddenly Jesus as king could be taken seriously again. The idea of Jesus as High Priest could be taken seriously for the first time – that his death was his own intentional, once for all sacrifice for the sins of all those who would ever trust in him. So much of his teaching began to make sense to them, sense that it never had made before. They could suddenly see how he was the “good shepherd who laid down his life for the sheep”, the “lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world”.
So, as we hear the story of Jesus, knowing its ending, let’s still try to experience it from the shoes of those who couldn’t see Easter coming. If we dare to look into the dark of their hopelessness, we may learn more about the brightness of the lights that came on at the resurrection, and that are still shining. That way we may also learn something about navigating our own future-blind lives by faith.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Waveringly unwavering
"By faith Abraham, when he was called to go out into a place which he should after receive an inheritance, obeyed." (Heb. 11:8.)
Whither he went, he knew not; it was enough for him to know that he went with God. He leant not so much upon the promises as upon the Promiser. He looked not on the difficulties of his lot, but on the King, eternal, immortal, invisible, the only wise God, who had deigned to appoint his course, and would certainly vindicate Himself. O glorious faith! This is thy work, these are thy possibilities; contentment to sail with sealed orders, because of unwavering confidence in the wisdom of the Lord High Admiral; willinghood to rise up, leave all, and follow Christ, because of the glad assurance that earth's best cannot bear comparison with Heaven's least. -F.B.M.
Whither he went, he knew not; it was enough for him to know that he went with God. He leant not so much upon the promises as upon the Promiser. He looked not on the difficulties of his lot, but on the King, eternal, immortal, invisible, the only wise God, who had deigned to appoint his course, and would certainly vindicate Himself. O glorious faith! This is thy work, these are thy possibilities; contentment to sail with sealed orders, because of unwavering confidence in the wisdom of the Lord High Admiral; willinghood to rise up, leave all, and follow Christ, because of the glad assurance that earth's best cannot bear comparison with Heaven's least. -F.B.M.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
I don't mind if I am getting nowhere
I don't mind if I am getting nowhere
circling the seed of light
I've been greedy for some destination
I can't get to where are you?
Turning reverie to perfect solids, bone and shells to hide ourselves
I tried, but can't find refuge in the angle, I walk the mystery of the curve
Five colors blind the eyes
see the world inside
amazed alone
I don't mind if I am getting nowhere
circling the seed of truth
Telling everything but saying nothing
I went further than I knew
giving meaning a resuscitation
the darkest soul illuminates
the sky is changing I'm unknowing knowing
as every sign of new life waits
Five colors blind the eyes
see the world inside
amazed alone
Opening my hands...closing wounds I made myself
raise the dead and bury all my fears
Listen to the rain
and the bells that ring in my dreams
turning time to break its line from here
to the small forgotten road
where we see the concrete world disintegrating
I don't mind if I am getting nowhere
circling the seed of light
I've been greedy for some destination
I can't get to where are you?
Turning reverie to perfect solids, bone and shells to hide ourselves
I tried, but can't find refuge in the angle, I walk the mystery of the curve
Approved Unto God
ABANDONED
Utterly abandoned to the Holy Ghost!
Seeking all His fullness at whatever cost;
Cutting all the shore-lines, launching in the deep
Of His mighty power--strong to save and keep.
Utterly abandoned to the Holy Ghost!
Oh! the sinking, sinking, until self is lost!
Until the emptied vessel lies broken at His feet;
Waiting till His filling shall make the work complete.
Utterly abandoned to the will of God;
Seeking for no other path than my Master trod;
Leaving ease and pleasure, making Him my choice,
Waiting for His guidance, listening for His voice.
Utterly abandoned! no will of my own;
For time and for eternity, His, and His alone
All my plans and purposes lost in His sweet will,
Having nothing, yet in Him all things possessing still.
Utterly abandoned! 'tis so sweet to be
Captive in His bonds of love, yet so wondrous free;
Free from sin's entanglements, free from doubt and fear,
Free from every worry, burden, grief or care.
Utterly abandoned! oh, the rest is sweet,
As I tarry, waiting, at His blessed feet;
Waiting for the coming of the Guest divine,
Who my inmost being shall perfectly refine.
Lo! He comes and fills me, Holy Spirit sweet!
I, in Him, am satisfied! I, in Him, complete!
And the light within my soul shall nevermore grow dim
While I keep my covenant--abandoned unto Him!
-Author Unknown
Utterly abandoned to the Holy Ghost!
Seeking all His fullness at whatever cost;
Cutting all the shore-lines, launching in the deep
Of His mighty power--strong to save and keep.
Utterly abandoned to the Holy Ghost!
Oh! the sinking, sinking, until self is lost!
Until the emptied vessel lies broken at His feet;
Waiting till His filling shall make the work complete.
Utterly abandoned to the will of God;
Seeking for no other path than my Master trod;
Leaving ease and pleasure, making Him my choice,
Waiting for His guidance, listening for His voice.
Utterly abandoned! no will of my own;
For time and for eternity, His, and His alone
All my plans and purposes lost in His sweet will,
Having nothing, yet in Him all things possessing still.
Utterly abandoned! 'tis so sweet to be
Captive in His bonds of love, yet so wondrous free;
Free from sin's entanglements, free from doubt and fear,
Free from every worry, burden, grief or care.
Utterly abandoned! oh, the rest is sweet,
As I tarry, waiting, at His blessed feet;
Waiting for the coming of the Guest divine,
Who my inmost being shall perfectly refine.
Lo! He comes and fills me, Holy Spirit sweet!
I, in Him, am satisfied! I, in Him, complete!
And the light within my soul shall nevermore grow dim
While I keep my covenant--abandoned unto Him!
-Author Unknown
A song God can sing to me
Yes, I just Rick-rolled my own blog. Whatevs.
NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP
We’re no strangers to love
You know the rules and so do I
A full commitment’s what I’m thinking of
You wouldn’t get this from any other guy
I just wanna tell you how I’m feeling
Gotta make you understand
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
We’ve know each other for so long
Your heart’s been aching
But you’re too shy to say it
Inside we both know what’s been going on
We know the game and we’re gonna play it
And if you ask me how I’m feeling
Don’t tell me you’re too blind to see
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, give you up
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, give you up
-Rick Astley (you know it)
NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP
We’re no strangers to love
You know the rules and so do I
A full commitment’s what I’m thinking of
You wouldn’t get this from any other guy
I just wanna tell you how I’m feeling
Gotta make you understand
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
We’ve know each other for so long
Your heart’s been aching
But you’re too shy to say it
Inside we both know what’s been going on
We know the game and we’re gonna play it
And if you ask me how I’m feeling
Don’t tell me you’re too blind to see
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, give you up
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, give you up
-Rick Astley (you know it)
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
An in-between time
THE SHOW
I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
i don't know where to go, can't do it alone
I've tried, and i don't know why...
Slow it down, make it stop
Or else my heart is going to pop
'Cause it's too much, yeah it's a lot
To be something i'm not
I'm a fool out of love
'Cause i just can't get enough...
I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
i don't know where to go, can't do it alone
I've tried, and i don't know why
I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but i don't show it
I can't figure it out, it's bringing me down
I know i've got to let it go...
And just enjoy the show
The sun is hot in the sky
Just like a giant spotlight
The people follow the signs
And synchronize in time
It's a joke, nobody knows
They've got a ticket to the show....
i want my money back
i want my money back
i want my money back
just enjoy the show
I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
i don't know where to go, can't do it alone
I've tried, and i don't know why...
Slow it down, make it stop
Or else my heart is going to pop
'Cause it's too much, yeah it's a lot
To be something i'm not
I'm a fool out of love
'Cause i just can't get enough...
I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
i don't know where to go, can't do it alone
I've tried, and i don't know why
I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but i don't show it
I can't figure it out, it's bringing me down
I know i've got to let it go...
And just enjoy the show
The sun is hot in the sky
Just like a giant spotlight
The people follow the signs
And synchronize in time
It's a joke, nobody knows
They've got a ticket to the show....
i want my money back
i want my money back
i want my money back
just enjoy the show
Thursday, May 7, 2009
My food is to do your will
THE CHRIST OF OBEDIENCE
Here at your feet,
Crucified Lord,
I gaze on you;
but the more I gaze
the less I understand.
My body trembles
as I ponder your words
to the Father:
“My food is to do your will
and to drink of the cup
you have prepared for me,
even though bitter and terrifying.”
Crucified Lord,
do you understand my terror?
Do you empathize with my inability
to surrender to your love
and to say “yes”
in obedience to the Father?
Help me, Lord,
for I would like to surrender . . .
But only with your help
will I be able to echo with my being
the painful “fiat” of your Mother.
-Bishop William Giaquinta
Here at your feet,
Crucified Lord,
I gaze on you;
but the more I gaze
the less I understand.
My body trembles
as I ponder your words
to the Father:
“My food is to do your will
and to drink of the cup
you have prepared for me,
even though bitter and terrifying.”
Crucified Lord,
do you understand my terror?
Do you empathize with my inability
to surrender to your love
and to say “yes”
in obedience to the Father?
Help me, Lord,
for I would like to surrender . . .
But only with your help
will I be able to echo with my being
the painful “fiat” of your Mother.
-Bishop William Giaquinta
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
More Pop Songs to Sing to God
NO ONE
I just want you close
Where you can stay forever
You can be sure
That it will only get better
You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don't worry 'cuz
Everything's gonna be alright
People keep talking they can say what they like
But all I know is everything's
gonna be alright
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I
feel for you
When the rain is pouring down
And my heart is hurting
You will always be around
This I know for certain
You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don't worry 'cuz
Everything's gonna be alright
People keep talking they can say what they like
But all I know is everything's
gonna be alright
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I
feel for you
I know some people search the world
To find something like what we have
I know people will try to
divide something so real
So til the end of time I'm
telling you there is no one
No one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I
feel for you
-Alicia Keys
I just want you close
Where you can stay forever
You can be sure
That it will only get better
You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don't worry 'cuz
Everything's gonna be alright
People keep talking they can say what they like
But all I know is everything's
gonna be alright
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I
feel for you
When the rain is pouring down
And my heart is hurting
You will always be around
This I know for certain
You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don't worry 'cuz
Everything's gonna be alright
People keep talking they can say what they like
But all I know is everything's
gonna be alright
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I
feel for you
I know some people search the world
To find something like what we have
I know people will try to
divide something so real
So til the end of time I'm
telling you there is no one
No one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I
feel for you
-Alicia Keys
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